Archive for the 'Rants' Category


Kerrigan, imaletyoufinish.

Yo Kerrigan, I’m really happy for you imaletyoufinish, but Bob Page was the greatest Video Game Villain of all time!

Gamestop have announced the results of their competition to find the greatest video game villain of all time.
Continue reading ‘Kerrigan, imaletyoufinish.’


Will someone please think of the children!

What are games teaching children?

I came across, the blog belonging to a religious nut-case who is concerned about what spore is teaching children. Clearly concern about teaching evolution over creationism is stupid, there is so much evidence in favour of evolution, it has even been observed in a lab[1], that is is not considered a theory any more. But it did get me thinking, what are games teaching children?

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Why Paid DLC and multiplayer Don’t mix

SEGA have recently announced that they are going to be charging around £5 for a pack of four multiplayer maps for AvP. This isn’t the first time a developer has done this in a game but as it is the first time it will have an impact on me (as I own the game in question) it is the first time I have really thought about it. My firsts thoughts were of how stupid the idea of charging for extra multiplayer maps is and then I happened to come across another article on the same site just moments later. The article in question was an interview with the devs at Futuremark (They made Shattered Horizon, a niche multiplayer game I covered last month that is still more popular than AvP multiplayer) and in it (among other things) they explained why paid DLC for multiplayer games shouldn’t be made.

Continue reading ‘Why Paid DLC and multiplayer Don’t mix’


Angels are never idle

Wow, what a shitstorm Valve have brewed up this time, and over something so stupid as virtual hats.

Fortunately it has more or less blown over now (and I missed it due to a poor internet connection making me unable to play TF2) but it just goes to show that a huge number of TF2 players are arseholes. The hats were supposed to be rare, if you want to play dressing up dolls go and play Battlefield Heroes. I’m not saying Valve were right to give out the rare hats randomly, that was a bit stupid. I would have had strictly limited numbers given out as awards, are you in the first 10,000 players to get 1 million lifetime kills as a Pyro? Have the fireman’s hat. With an achievements like this for each of them the hats would be rare and actually mean something.

To be honest that isn’t the point, the point is people who cheated the system have been punished and are now saying that the were not told it was wrong to cheat in that way. Well they were, the subscriber agreement states that you must not use any third party program to gain an unfair advantage. You might say that as the hats are purely cosmetic there is no advantage. Wrong. The people using the idler program did have an advantage, an advantage in getting hats, they had extra tickets for the lottery if you will.

Valve could have simply banned everyone using the idler as they had broken the agreement, Blizzard do that to people using a bot in Word of Warcraft. Instead they were quite nice about it, simply removing only the items that had been earned using the idler. Their next decision was possibly dubious, giving everyone who didn’t use the idler a halo hat. They did this as a bit of a joke I think, to show that they saw the funny side of the whole thing. It backfired because they didn’t anticipate how many total idiots there are who think that having a hat in TF2 is the most important thing in the world, it is these idiots who decided to play medic and refuse to heal anyone with a halo, it was these idiots who started screaming bloody murder on the official TF2 forums, it was these idiots who, by putting a virtual hat above having fun, are ruining the game for the rest of us.

Be patient, you may get the hat you want, you may not, but there are a lot more important things in life than a virtual hat. If you still find you can’t have fun in TF2 without the hat then I suggest you go outside and get some fresh air and possibly visit your doctor.


Left 4 Dead – Left 2 Die? (Updated)

A lot of people are happy that a sequel to Left 4 Dead has been announced, a lot of people are upset or even angry however and I really can’t blame them.

The people saying they deserve free content are of course wrong, Valve owe them nothing of the sort. I do however believe that some of them do have a point. They paid anywhere between £20 and £35 (depending on where they got it and when) for Left 4 Dead and have now been told that it was the price for one years play. “But you can continue to play Left 4 Dead after the sequel comes out” I hear you say, not entirely true. Look at what happened when Epic released a direct (and improved) replacement for Unreal Tournament 2003 one year later, everyone moved to Unreal Tournament 2004, and servers for 2003 became empty and lonely places. A sequel with this few changes, mainly things that were promised in the release of the original, will move most of the playerbase away from the original game, leaving only the bots to play with. Some people are saying “Valve will continue to support the first game”, but that really doesn’t mater if there is no one playing it any more. Perhaps Valve intend to turn it into a yearly franchise? Well there is a reason why I don’t buy multiplayer games published by Activision, they don’t bloody last. Everyone moves on to the inevitable sequel and your game becomes worthless. If I wanted to pay a subscription for my on-line gaming then I would buy a bloody XBox, I don’t need the latest mindless sequel to have fun in an on-line game, I just need other players to still be on it. I know multiplayer games have a limited lifespan, (you can’t find many servers for Death Match Classic any more, UT2004 is almost unplayable on-line) but to limit it to one year like this is frigging ridiculous.
Continue reading ‘Left 4 Dead – Left 2 Die? (Updated)’


Fed up with waiting.

I am fed up with waiting.

Why is it that the PC release of a multi-platform game is nearly always 3-6 months later than a console release? Why is it that we are still waiting for Street Fighter IV? Why is it that Atari bent over for Sony and let them publish Ghostbusters on PS3 first? Why do I have to wait for September until I can play Battlefield 1943?

Surely these delays and “exclusives” can’t be helping sales? Any hype that there was about the game will have died down before they come to PC and I know full well that in the case of Ghostbusters it is purely to do with marketing. Before Sony got out their wallet it was scheduled for release at the same time on all platforms, and in America it still is, so it is not like they have finished the PS3 version but need some time to work on the others, they are all (nearly?) done. Atari are fucking idiots, I really hope they lose a shitload of cash over this. Releasing on the platform with the smallest install base months in advance of the others is lunacy.

I bring this up now because I have just found out the Battlefield 1943 release dates. I am really looking forward to this game, but there is no way I will play a FPS on a console (and don’t own a PS3 or XBox anyway) so am a bit pissed off that I have to wait longer. Are they going to add extra stuff? Is it going to be that much more polished? Only time will tell but I doubt it. I suspect it is another pile of cash from Microsoft and Sony that has “delayed” it, same with Street Fighter IV.

I just hope that Sony/Microsoft don’t do the same with Batman: Arkham Asylum. I want to play it this year, not have to wait an additional 6 months after the release.

Internet Angry Man over and out.



Give me back my server browser!

What is it with PC games these days? It seems they have caught a disease from the consoles called matchmaking. A lobby system to start your online games. Supposedly this makes it easier to find a server to play on but, if you want a public game, what the fuck was wrong with sorting by ping and then selecting a non passworded server with some players on? And what if you don’t want to play on public servers? What happened to being able to join a dedicated server that you run with some friends?

Left 4 Dead is a brilliant game but if there is one thing that puts me off it is the lobby system. It has on numerous times given me a server where the other players have kicked me because they didn’t know me, on other occasions it gave me a server with a ping so high I think it might have been in New Zealand.
Fortunately in Left 4 Dead you can just open the console and type “openserverbrowser” and can then join your favourite server without playing lucky dip.

But now Valve are saying

The Steamworks matchmaking now includes the “robust lobby system” shipped and tested in Left 4 Dead.[1].

Brilliant, now more developers have an easier way to ditch the server browser and replace it with this console lobby nonsense.

Internet Angry Man – Out.


[1] link



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